We have all been through times of pain and suffering, yet extreme cases can be traumatizing. Some examples of these are the loss of a loved one, a breakup, a natural disaster, and even great spiritual trials called dark nights. During these troubling times one may lose one’s trust in God. One may ask, “Has He abandoned me? How could He do this to me? Why should I trust in Him again?” What can a believer do? How can one recover and trust in Him again? It is not easy to trust in God, but it is possible.
What are the harmful effects that one can fall into if one does not regain one’s trust in God? One can fall into emptiness and passivity. St. Augustine of Hippo’s words still ring true: “Our hearts were made for You O Lord, and they are restless until they rest in You.” Who would ever desire this death sentence? Another possibility is that one can be consumed by bitter resentment and possibly abandon one’s faith. Finally, one may fall into the verbal abuse trap by claiming that one is just trying “to get it off of my chest.” “All that stuff about the Cosmic Sadist was not so much the expression of thought as of hatred. I was getting from it the only pleasure a man in anguish can get; the pleasure of hitting back… ‘what I thought’ didn’t mean what I thought was true. Only what I thought would offend Him…” (Lewis 39-40).
The boundary in solving this problem is our human nature. We doubt, think negatively, or may be stubborn in our views, thinking that we know better than God. Human nature also falls back into old habits. Even after a period where things are getting better we may relapse. As we all know, people make mistakes. We are imperfect creatures, but that does not mean that we should stop aiming for the very best. I would rather receive a ninety percent on a test than a zero. One only needs to start little by little. Jesus gives us the example of the mustard seed. “It is the smallest of all the seeds, yet when full-grown it is the largest of plants” (Mt 13:31-32).
When times are hard, we may see God as a very cruel person who takes sadistic pleasure in our sufferings. “It is said that if a lamb constantly veers away from the safety of the flock and into danger, the shepherd will break its legs and then carry it on his shoulders and personally care for it. By the time the bones mend and the lamb can walk again, it has come to love and trust the shepherd so much that it never leaves his side” (Evert 40). Contrary to what we expect, somehow the pain that we are going through is really for our own benefit. The cure may be worse than the illness, but the effects are worthwhile. If we let Him tend to us and guide us, not only will we walk on the right path, but we will grow in our love for Him and learn to depend on Him. We are very weak and desperately need the help of Christ. He tells us, “without me you can do nothing” (Jn 15:5).
Going from when we are incandescently happy, to when we are in a state of total agony is traumatic. We may complain that, “ ‘It was too perfect to last’ ” (Lewis 48). Before falling to lamentations, or when trying to rise above them, think of God saying, “ ‘Good; you have mastered that exercise. I am very pleased with it. And now you are ready to go on to the next.’ When you have learned to do quadratics and enjoy doing them you will not be set them much longer. The teacher moves you on” (Lewis 49). The Lord has many other lessons to teach us and even more adventures to send us on.
Scripture is helpful in discovering or even rediscovering why we should trust in the Lord. Reading scripture in its proper context, and reflecting on it is called the prayer of Lectio Divina. Here are a few examples of helpful biblical verses:
“Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they?...Why are you anxious about clothes? Learn from the way the wild flowers grow. They do not work or spin...If God so clothes the grass of the field, which grows today and is thrown into the oven tomorrow, will he not much more provide for you, O you of little faith." (Mt 6: 26, 28, 30)
Surely, if God can take care of very small matters then He can certainly take care of big ones as well. Human beings are very precious in His sight, for we are created in His image (Gen. 1:27).
Another example is in the incident with Martha and Mary. Jesus visits two women friends. Mary sits at the feet of the Lord and listens to His words intently (Lk 10: 39). Her sister Martha, on the other hand, is frantically serving the Lord. She complains to Him, asking why He does not tell Mary to get up and help her (Lk 10: 40). He replies, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and worried about many things. There is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part and it will not be taken from her” (Lk 10: 41-42). We can become so caught up in our daily tasks and problems that it is easy for us to forget what is truly important. Sometimes we just need to pause and spend time with Jesus in prayer. He waits for us and yearns for us. In Him we find peace, joy, and strength.
One more example from scripture is very important for us to keep in mind. “And behold, I am with you always, until the end of the age” (Mt 28: 20). Here Jesus promises us that He will never leave us, no matter what. No matter what we go through on earth, He is always at our side. We are never alone.
The most important thing that we must do is remember that the Lord loves us. How do we know this? We know this because thousands of years ago He suffered the most excruciating physical, emotional, and spiritual pain ever known and died the most agonizing death. Meditating on His sufferings is a truly horrendous experience. One could never completely imagine the magnitude of His pain. There is only one answer for why He endured this; love. Blessed Mother Teresa said that, “Love to be real, it must cost- it must hurt- it must empty us of self” (“Love”). His death was the ultimate display of love. It brought us eternal life. The gates of Heaven were finally unlocked after the sin of Adam and Eve. He redeemed us. How can we not trust the one who loves us this much? May we never forget His love for us.
Another step that one can take in this situation is to rely on the intercession of the saints and Mary. The saints are our brothers and sisters in Christ and Mary is our mother. These holy men and women are our friends in “high” places. They understand what we are going through and desire to help us, for they have been through these trials as well. By praying through them, studying their lives, and imitating them we shall learn how to fight the good fight.
As regards to Mary, she is especially powerful with her Son, for she was the one who influenced Him to perform His first miracle at the wedding of Cana (Jn 2: 3- 11). Notice how at Cana, she told the servers, “Do whatever he tells you” (Jn 2: 5). Her true purpose is to lead us to her son. In the words of St. Josemaria Escriva, “…and she- your holy mother Mary- offers you, along with the grace of her son, the refuge of her arms, the tenderness of her embrace… and you will find yourself with added strength for the new battle” (“Our Lady”).
Last but not least, one must treasure the Eucharist. Blessed Pier Giorgio passionately declared that “With all the strength of my soul I urge you young people to approach the Communion table as often as you can. Feed on this bread of angels whence you will draw all the energy you need to fight inner battles” (“The Most Blessed Sacrament”). Not only does receiving the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Christ strengthen us, but so does Eucharistic adoration. Sometimes one speaks, at other times listens, and there are even times when one simply remains in the presence of one’s Beloved. What joy and peace there is in this!
As one can see, one can recover from not trusting in God. One must be patient, learn to depend on God, and step out of blaming Him for one’s problems. One needs time set aside for prayer, time to reflect on scripture, as well as to meditate on the passion of Christ and His love for us, be devoted to the saints and Mary, and treasure the gift of the Eucharist. It is not easy to trust in God, but it is possible.
Works Cited
Evert, Crystalina. Pure Womanhood. San Diego: Catholic Answers, 2007.
Lewis, C.S. A Grief Observed. New York: HarperCollins, 1961.
“Love.” Pureloveclub.com. Electric Pulp. 2007. 7 November 2007.
“The Most Blessed Sacrament.” Pureloveclub.com. Electric Pulp. 2007. 7 November
2007.
The New American Bible. Ed. Hartman, Canada: World Bible Inc., 1987.
“Our Lady.” Pureloveclub.com. Electric Pulp 2007. 7 November 2007.
